What’s Good About Friday?

Good Friday moments with my kids and with their mom. It’s nice to see them smiling and enjoying the day seeing us with civil respect from each other. Though we’re separated; however, the intention of making our kids to be happy is always our ultimate goal.

Love, Peace and Happiness.




It’s funny to think that you don’t believed that we evolved from animals (it’s your right), here’s a series of photos that will simplify my explanation. If you can’t understand, I guess you have some serious problem about humanity. 

Keep your placebo faith. 





Shinobi Naku Songs

“I Wish I could be every little thing you wanted all the time.”


“Every Little Thing”

How I wish I am but it only gives me frustration. I think I have a better understanding with my life right now, breaking with the “this is how your life should be, look at them be like them”. Then who gives a fuck? Why in the hell should I imitate them? It doesn’t give me happiness and it is a total waste of time. Haven’t you noticed? The time when I took control of myself without your annoying, degrading humiliating and discriminating words of wisdom, I tasted victory. I remind you of this because there is no “Diploma” needed, my only arsenal is my determination to excel, my interest in my chosen job and my heart which I poured out my truest emotion for I do love what I am doing. I guess all of you are just too insensitive to point out the difference between loving what you love to do rather than insisting your traditional fixed mindset which definitely doesn’t help, that also frustrates your wishes. Life is not all about “work-eat-sleep”, as they said at some point we have to find options to break away from that routine. We are here in this world to discover and appreciate the things that surrounds us, the art teacher once said “Go out and Wonder”. She said “Surround yourself with questions and slowly discover the answers in your own effort, fill yourself with the question WHY?’. She is right because I grew up full of questions, I even question the religion that I grew up with and I found the answers through the various thoughts of the known idealist whom I shared the same point of view. It is really funny to think as I recall when they put you into shame because they want you to attend mass every Sunday and saying “That is why you are not blessed because you are not obliging yourself to attend the Sunday Mass” which in that sense I couldn’t argue upon because “that’s their belief”. Made me think though, for seconds, minutes, hours, weeks, months and even years wondering what is the connection for all the things they said to me, for the record I do pray alone, before I sleep and when I wake up. I am always been thankful because every morning I can still feel the features in my face and the Known God gave me another reason to live, breathe life again and I am always been blessed with that kind of mentality. I look like a condemned human being because of my physical features (I intended to look like this way because I was able to determine the hypocrites living in the society and it is very effective).

Furthermore, those questions of life became my inspiration to learn and discover things. It really gave me a better understanding on how to live my life. The problem is, when you have this idea and you all have the supporting points to explain the things plus an exhibit of your experience, you are labeled as “mentally ill, crazy” and I don’t know why. So it came to my mind that what the society had known you before, you are not allowed to change the way you are. What a crazy society I lived in. Few people will fully understand and those types of people are blessed with high level of understanding. The thing is even your own family are the sole responsible of spreading the bad things and it really is a fucked up life, if you know what I mean. Again, I didn’t judge directly because I always see the other side of it on why they are treating me like that. Ever since I was doing all the positive things in life. Back in the day I even excel in school academics but still nobody cares to go up on the stage, well thank you teachers for pinning the ribbons and medals. The only people that give credit to your hard worked are the ones who are not closed to you, funny to think eh. There are many instances in my life that I gave to them just because I am an illegitimate child, my life experiences became more meaningful due to the failures which became my inspiration to challenge myself.

“Do the things that scares you most”. I knew, it is not easy to write but my domestic experiences became my tool to create portraits and to write poetry blog, for it eases my feelings if I write or draw. It is also my only way to pour out my emotion when nobody wants to hear me.

“So I walk up on high and step to the edge, to see my world below. And I laughed at myself while the tears roll down, ‘cause it’s the world I know. It’s the world I know.”

“The World I Know”

When the time I was awakened I started my journey to the world of creativity and never had an instance of having a doubt in my instinct. It really feels good to be in a place where you belong. No other words could really express the triumph I felt. I gain more friends outside my country and they always gave me more inspiration to do well and develop the potential in me. I must say a big cure and definitely a relief to life’s downside. I figured out that the society I live defined success as a newborn child, everyone in the group cuddles and cheers but if success failed, you are the illegitimate baby being abandoned. So, it is good thing that I’m an illegitimate, it is an insult for them because of their humiliating words that I couldn’t do it (but I didn’t hate them) in fact it became my inspiration. I wanted them to share the experiences I had when the time they did that, but I hope they fully realized that what they did is wrong, pride I must say. Well and good, I can’t force them to change for who they are, besides they’re “old enough”.

“I didn’t change I just see things differently”

Indeed, I am. 

Positivity, determination, trust, love, patience, understanding, sacrifice and aside from that the three key factors in my life;

-Connect all the dots of failure

-Make the best things today for tomorrow’s benefit

-Karma is sweet (if you know how to handle)

Emotion Sickness

The young fella was longing for her attention, she made excuses and t’was too absurd to mention.

She acted numb and dumb, the young fella felt she was nowhere to be found, thinking she was drowned.

The young fella was emotionally disturbed because she abdicated the throne and now he felt a chill in his bone.

“I felt like she’s trying to sell down the river” the young fella botherly said, then he’s weeping bitterly.

“Life would be easy if she will communicate with me daily,  I will not blame my Father for he slowly re-arranging things orderly.”

The Thing That Should Not Be

I grew up in a culture that has full of tradition because I am an Asian. Our country was under the hands of the Spanish regime for about 300 years. So basically a lot of teachings and traditions is still present up until now. The influenced of the Spanish era has a big impact to us obviously, like our religion in which I was baptized as a Roman Catholic, the famous Fiesta celebration, education and among others.

The Spanish colonization brought an impact to us that enable us to have a closed-family tie relationship. Indeed, it is a major factor here but not knowing the effect that it caused to a certain family. The presence of jealousy, attitude problem, dependency and indolence in which is the most common thing here in our society. What I hate about it also is the so called “debt of honor”, in which we are obliged to pay back the things that our family have invested, in some sense it is good if a certain person was a successful one. The thing is you have to do it up until your last breath. The family always expects and if you fail to give for what they are asking, then a long list of fuckin’ insult you will probably hear from them. 

So, expect them to have a major change of their behaviors, they’ll probably will not talk to you and they will pretend that they didn’t know you. The funny thing is that your own family will basically ruin your own reputation to the society. That’s the dumbest thing that I observed from our culture. They will not accept any further explanation why a certain person failed to give the favor that they asked and the famous line will be “Look, how he|she had changed, now that he|she is on top of us, he|she didn’t realize the sacrifices we had for him|her and blah-blah-blah.” 

Oh! Well, that’s the reality in which I couldn’t even tolerate to agree upon. It causes the family to clash, I must say. A simple understanding should be applied for that instance because mostly people always thought of the “debt of honor” thing. It should be in our mind always that other people have also personal priorities and life is not always about chocolate and candies, they encounter problems too. Why can’t we just wait for the time when he|she will heartily hand the things to you, thoughtfullness basically means you are important because she|he remembers you. Do not expect too much because that causes a person to being upset. It is also important that we will instill the values of being respectful to others, so that in return we gain the respect that we want. 

It is very imperative to value others decisions, we grow up differently and we find happiness based on our individual personalities.

Respect is earned not given.

That is why we are unique from each other. Let us avoid dictating the things that we want because it is disrespectful. In addition, we must not look ourselves through their eyes because we are the sole controller of our own destinty.

The Karma Bus Ride

I was waiting for the Karma Bus and minutes later the bus arrived beeping. It was so crowded inside full of boisterous passengers. The bus has no proper destination and there’s no need for an explanation. They said it was a journey of condemnation with no guaranteed satisfaction.

I found myself completely bemused and I became anxious. I courteously asked the lady driver to pull over and by the way her name was December. So, it was very easy for me to remember because she was attractive and clever.

The place that I choose was full of fascination and an arsenal for my inspiration. The ride of condemnation was an eye-opener and I must be thankful to Miss December. I swear! you will always be in my heart forever.

I started to recreate my existence because I was floundering. The whole tribe thought my life is humiliating because they kept on comparing me to the others, but I moved on sending the message that the path I choose was not boring but very amusing.

I am an eagle escaping from the cage of sorrow, happily soaring high in the infinite sky. One day they will understand, when my body starts colder and when I will start to turn the blind eye. 

Why Do We Suffer?

It is always been our question when it terms to the down fall of our life. Aside from that we always questioned our known God by asking ourselves “Did God bring our suferring?” Or “Is suffering done from free choice and is suffering external to humanity?”
Let us understand and consider one factor that may caused our suffering which is “social problems”.

Our life depends on how we end up in the society because we are taught how to socialize in our school, that they want us to look good in the society that we lived in. The school also provides knowledge tool in general and school itself is responsible for the secondary socialization by making a manifest functions. 

The school also gave us the chance to create and select our own group of friends that we hooked up everyday. So it is now the start of “the sense of belonging” either it is a good influential friends or a bad influential set of friends. 

Basically, choosing our set of friends depends on the best interest of ourselves that we are very comfortable and welcome.

Our peers or friends socialized to be able to have a sense of belonging. Take this example like being in a gang or a certain group,   in which a person may tend to have a characteristics of having self-competence, love and connectivity.

From the very beginning in which we re-socialized (the pattern to adapt new ones like in prison and religious conversion) to be able to have a stable function in the society. Re-socialization may also involved stress, almost and always, in relation to the the type of work we are in. But stress in general can be eased through theraphy, which is also considered as one factor of re-socialization because it helps us to adapt new sense for who we are.

Lastly, there are expectations in the society that we can do as an appropriate individual. The idea of socialization is continous to the very end. We are basically judged by the people of who our friends are. When they knew that one or two of your friends are known addicts, of course the group that you are in to are labelled “addict friends“.

Yes, it’s true that addiction is more on cultural influenced but another factor that will be considered also is psychological. If a certain person has high addiction it means that he has high psychological reaction. It may be associated with the strange relationship with the family. 

Yes, We cannot blame the others to judged because there is a certain thing called correlation, like there is a correlation in substance abuse and crime. In general aspect, the correlation which is a variable that happens but it is hard to react what causes the other. More likely, we cannot judged a certain person why he or she is addicted because there are many factors involved on it.

But to be honest, dealing with an addict is not a big problem in the society. They are more emotional, so to speak. They found love in a certain group that they belong and that kind of emotion was never shown by their loved ones. This type of people are very honest and very much emotional. The most loyal one that they are not tired of loving even if the that person never loved them back. 

I knew because I was part of it and i’ve been there chasing the bee that flits from flower to flower and hoping I will catch it, so that I will achieve the infinite blithe.